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Communication - Authenticity
By daniel | February 15, 2005
This is the fourth in a series of essays based on my reading of The Revolutionary Communicator, by Jedd Medefind and Erik Lokkesmoe.
Authenticity
“Who was more real than Jesus?” I ask. Many spiritual giants spell out pretty clearly how authenticity is a byproduct of true spiritual maturity.
Dallas Willard, one of my personal favorite authors, puts it this way (in The Divine Conspiracy): “The child's face is a constant epiphany because it doesn't yet know how to do this [guard one's emotions]… Those who have attained considerable spiritual stature are frequently noted for their 'childlikeness.' What this really means is that they do not use their face and body to hide their spiritual reality. In their body they are genuinely present to those around them.”
Let me up front say that this realness of our face toward others is not the goal. We are saying that this authenticity is a byproduct of spiritual maturity. This maturity bring the authenticity, and the authenticity is not a goal in and of itself, though it is critical to communication in the manner we are discussing.
What we seek is to truly open ourselves to those we are trying to communicate with - giving them value. What we, unfortunately, are used to doing - these habits we have ingrained - is a sort of impression management (John Ortberg, The Life You've Always Wanted, pg 169). Our primary goal in communication, it seems, is to maintain an impression to those we talk to — less important is it even who we are talking to or what is being said as it is how we end up appearing to those around us. Have you ever caught yourself not listening when someone else was talking, but instead preparing your next point. This is certainly bass-ackwards, pardon my french.
The cure for this impression-management behaviour is simply finding the freedom that we have in Christ, and the freedom that Christ has (and displayed in the gospels) to simply not care what people think of us and seek their best interests and seek to know them through our interactions. I think this may be the first step towards some real spiritual maturity and authenticity in communication.
These are just a few thoughts, as we seek to actually love each other well, and communicate instead of just passing information.
Brother Daniel of Nashville.
Topics: Spirituality - Essays |
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