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Friend of the Bridegroom
By daniel | February 27, 2005
Dear friends,
As we?ve explored the New Testament concerning Christ?s bride there is one matter we haven?t yet developed very thoroughly ? the friend of the bridegroom. Our discussions of the bride have given us, among other things, an awareness of why and how to engage our own transformation. Likewise, understanding ourselves as the bridegroom?s friend will help us immensely in the why?s and how?s of real-life ministry.
In the ancient Near East it was common to have a “friend of the bridegroom,” and sometimes two. One would help the bride prepare ? guarding her purity and chastity, seeing to it she had what she needed to get ready, taking some real personal responsibility for her preparation due to his love for his friend, the groom ? and the other might help the groom with the bridal chamber and other matters. Biblical references to the bridegroom?s friend are unanimously mentions of the former ? the assistant to the bride.
It is this relationship to the groom and bride that Paul uses in II Corinthians 11:2 to describe his own ambitions for the church in the city of Corinth, “for I am jealous for you with a godly jealously; for I betrothed you to one husband, so that to Christ I might present you a pure virgin.” Just listen to the ownership, the sense of felt personal responsibility sprinkled all over the statement. “I betrothed you” and “to Christ I might present you.” He?s “jealous?with a godly jealousy.” It?s not just that Paul loves the saints; Paul loves his Friend and is out for Christ?s best interests. Paul labors to shape, prepare, and present a pure church for Christ?s sake. He?s the bridegroom?s friend.
I want to be Jesus? friend. He?s called us his friends already (John 15:15) because he?s told us his intentions; he?s held nothing back. And he?s clearly our friend; there is none better (John 15:14). But am I his friend, really? Can he count on me? Can he lean on me? Now, let me be clear. I didn?t mean Jesus is weak, sad and needs a shoulder to cry on. Rather, what I mean can best be described this way: Imagine Jesus is not omniscient, that he doesn?t know everything. And imagine yourself having the following conversation with him.
“Hey, Jesus,” you say, “Where?s Virgil? What?s he up to right now?”
“I don?t know. But I know he?s my friend, so whatever he?s doing he?s doing for my church. He?s a good friend, that guy, I can count on him.”
I?d give my life for that conversation to be true. As a matter of fact, I?m currently devoting my life to becoming the kind of man for whom such statements from Jesus would be reasonable. I want God to be able to trust me. So, I see to my own growth. What?s more, I?m not waiting until I?m “just right” to start acting like the bridegroom?s friend. I?m learning to identify myself that way now, and I?m arranging my affairs accordingly, bringing my daily affairs into the service of that goal.
I?d invite you to do the same. I suspect you could do it at least as well as I do if you but chose. Jesus has called you his friend because he?s told you what he?s up to. Are you really his friend? Can he count on you to give yourself to the preparation of his beloved? Be the bride, devoted and loving. But be the bridegroom?s friend as well.
Trying to love Jesus by loving you,
Virgil
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